so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
