Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
