I think I died a long time ago.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis