Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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