are you so shy because you have an std?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
