you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
