Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
