shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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