do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
