My first STD was from a foam party
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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