they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i just google imaged poop.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
