C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
My pussy is not your playground.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Randomize
