If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
