Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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