kristin has been a bad kristin
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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