Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
