i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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