We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize