Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
