Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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