no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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