just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
