i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
