We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
29 People Who Do Dirty Things Just To Get Their Way
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan