Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize