i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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