you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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