new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
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no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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