ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
