did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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