Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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