how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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