like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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