bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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