I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize