Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
There are leaves in my underwear?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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