Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
