I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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