So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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