whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
