Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
operation have a gay friend backfired
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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