He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
