Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
