She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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