belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
