put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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