I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
