Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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