she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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