U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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